Not long after the move, Peri was flipping through a magazine when a notice caught her eye: A man from East Germany named Jurgen was seeking an Alaskan pen pal so he could practice writing in English. Intrigued, and in her second year of high school German at the time, Peri answered the ad.
“He would tell me what life was like in East Germany at a time when the Berlin Wall was still up,” Peri remembered.
The start of a long correspondence
Starting in 1975, Peri and Jurgen began to correspond through handwritten letters—sometimes including photographs, newspaper clippings, or postcards—usually about twice per year around Christmas and their birthdays. The letters began with Peri describing her life in Alaska as a teenager. As she grew older, she shared details about her first marriage and divorce, moving to Washington alone to study photography, and starting her career in the nonprofit sector.
Jurgen, in his mid-twenties when they became pen pals, told Peri about his wife, whom he married just a few months after they started writing. He wrote about German culture, customs, current events, and politics. They were still writing in 1989 when the Berlin Wall fell, and still writing in 2020 during the COVID-19 pandemic.
“We shared how COVID affected us and how our countries responded to it. There are so many stories we shared,” Peri said.
Writing through time
As the years passed, Peri remarried and built a life dedicated to giving back to others, as her mother had modeled. Fueled by her passion for history and genealogy, Peri volunteered at her local historical society for nearly two decades, where she helped identify veterans’ graves and ensure they received proper recognition. She preserved all her letters from Jurgen in a scrapbook; only her very first letter from him had gotten lost along the way.
Through it all, Peri and Jurgen had never met in person and never had each other’s telephone numbers. In fact, even as technology advanced, Jurgen never used a computer—all his letters remained handwritten.
“I never thought we would still be writing after 50 years… I have always wanted to meet my pen pal and visit him in his home country,” Peri said.
Living on a fixed retirement income made it difficult for Peri to plan a trip to Germany on her own, so Wish of a Lifetime stepped in. We flew Peri and her husband Steve to Dresden, Germany, to meet Jurgen and is wife Angelika for the first time.
Bridging the cultural divide
Jurgen and Angelika greeted Peri and Steve with signs and warm hugs upon their arrival, kicking off a special week. “Even though I’ve been writing to him for 50 years, you never know how it will go when you meet face to face. If your personalities will click,” shared Peri. “But from the beginning, it was like we were family.” And even though Angelika could speak just a few words in English, Peri’s high school German studies came back to her, and the two were able to communicate. “I don’t think she ever felt left out.”
The two couples toured a historic castle and church in Dresden, sampled traditional German food, became acquainted with the public transportation system, and got to see the community space where Jurgen maintains a garden. Most of all, “we had a great time just talking and laughing, sharing things we never thought to ask in letters,” Peri said.
Today, the lessons Peri has learned through her friendship with Jurgen play a significant role as she considers what she wants to pass on to future generations: “It is important for us as humans to appreciate and understand different cultures around the world… Knowing more about each other can help mend our differences.”
In an age where digital communication often overshadows traditional correspondence, Peri and Jurgen’s friendship—along with simple pen and paper—prove that cultural divides can still be bridged, even across thousands of miles.
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